Sometimes it's a bit Depressing

With the way things are going financially and with so many people in trouble...I had to try to find a way to keep from drowning in depression.

The news tends to focus on all the negative and hardship, rarely do you see a positive story that lifts the spirits and heart. I know stuff like that is happening, that there are people that are trying to make things better...we just don't hear much about it.

Like the editor says,"Bad news sells papers!"

Wouldn't it be great if good news sold more papers?
Like what happened after the last election...with papers worldwide covering that single event... I began to hope again last year...to not feel afraid...and no matter how difficult things get, I'm not going to lose that hope again...

I have to make changes, but they will be my changes...I will move forward and reach for my dreams again...

This way, I can show my kids that it's more than just surviving...life's more than that...it's about really getting your hands dirty and being active in life. It's about truly living one's life to the fullest. Life's messy, dangerous & scary - but it's also exciting, wonderful & amazing.

The journey belongs to the one living it - to choose to drift along and ride the ebb and flow letting it carry us along to where ever it goes. Or we can make the decision instead to live life as one extremely awesome and memorable time!

What do you want to leave behind? There is so much to do that can create a legacy, something to offer others not yet born. The choice for all of us is how we decide what to do. Drift along or steer for your own guiding star...

As I glide along, choosing my path ahead, I wish you well on your own journey. Carpe Diem!

The Shadow of Depression

It seems that lately the weight of so many things are hanging over head. So much to do and only one of me. I'm overwhelmed by the tasks that loom so high, what should be done by more is left to just one.

I've got to tend to the reducing of years of accumulation, from boxes left in storage for years to recent gifts to the holidays decor and gear. From clothing and stuffed toys, to dishes and knick knacks galore, plus the ton of uncategorized stuff that clutters the closets and more.

Plus the tasks of running a business online, that alone can be the worst grind of my time. Then assisting with other tasks as I continue with home schooling with my daughter. Thankfully the youngest isn't up for that yet. His older brother still handles those basic of tasks

Then the project that looms is the repairs of the house, to which I'm luckier than some at most. I've kin that will come to repair all the problems, but with all of us here that could be quite chaotic. So it's out of the house and off to another, taking what we need and storing the other. Hoping that once things are repaired, it will be safe to return to roost here.

But there are only empty places where friends used to come, the children are seemingly clueless to the tasks to complete, all wrapped in their own worlds of music, games and friends. So once again in the end it all comes rolling down to the one that is left...just me.

So the shadows of depression, the shade of despair have been summoned up from their dark empty lair. It's not like their strangers, we've kept company before...but they do little to aide in the work that lays before me like a black bloated toad on a rotted old log. It may be awhile till I find my way, the darkness about me makes it hard to see any way out.

But soon the shadows and shades will fade softly away, leaving me alone...but it will be ok. Loneliness is something familiar, so it isn't so bad - I've dwelt within it's hollow halls for more years than I wish to recall.

But eventually, I know it's true...the light will filter through the gloom. I'll take my moments of light now and then, confident that the night within will come to an end. But if you wish to offer a light, I won't refuse it...and I'll be glad for it's rays of friendship to chase off the emptiness, even if just for a while...no fear or worry....I know that things will be clear.....some day, the sun will shine again to warm me.