Friday, January 2, 2009

Elusiveness of Time

No matter how many hours pass within each day, there never seems to be enough to complete all that I've the need or desire to accomplish.
My list of projects and chores go forever on...
My time is claimed before it arrives. I find that even when I complete a task or two - that several more yet await my attention.
My days feel unending as I tend to the endless things that need to be done.
Three a.m. and 7 p.m. hold no difference as I work through my chores.
Sleep is something that descends upon me at unscheduled times as my exhaustion claims my consciousness for a few hours.

I can still recall my youth, of fresh cut grass and lazy summertime days that seem to go on forever.
Of fresh strawberries and whipped cream, swimming and catching tadpoles and tiny frogs.
I remember the early days of my motherhood, of walks to the boardwalk and playing in the sand.
Lullabies and little giggles, playing in the waterspout and having riding the carousel at the park.

I recall these memories out of time, I can relive them in a moment.
I see my children as they laugh and cry, play and work over the years as they have grown.
Yet I don't remember growing old myself, as I've watched them mature and go off on their own.
Following the path they have chosen for now, though I've still the younger ones safe at home.
I watch as they are changing, growing and I know that it won't be too long before they too will fly off into the world on their own road.

But time for all it's forever constant, it's eternal flow... It seems ever elusive to claim.
To mark the moments and save the memories, it's all I can do.
For I feel that no matter how many things I try to fill into those moments, someday I'll have none left to use.
And all those things I've wanted, desired or needed to do will be left undone.